Mike’s Typo

One of our six readers sent me this video. This is completely inappropriate for this forum. It’s despicable. But, in the interest of free speech and all that, I’ve included it. I’ve gotta tell you, I’d hate for you to watch this and think that we had anything to do with this. We did not produce this, star in it, or even think of the idea. (Wish we had. Did I say that?) Ride safe.

I understand many of you are glued to your Internet and have no time for TV. Or, perhaps you given up on the Giants, A’s, and Nascar - they’ve all sold out. Right? But, we didn’t want you to miss our latest commercial message - if for no other reason than it’s entertainment value.

It’s going to be another gorgeous weekend in Santa Cruz. And, we just uncrated a bunch of bikes that arrived yesterday. They’re being prep’d as we speak and will be on the floor for the weekend. Come down and check them out. There are some outrageous custom paint from Harley. There’s a new Cross Bones in Vivid Black - it looks fantastic. A few other gems in there too. So, swing by. We’d love to see you.

By the way. If you click-through to the commercial - you’re seeing it first. It doesn’t go live until this weekend. It’s fresh off the cutting-room floor!

As the hills south of Santa Cruz burn, there is lots of newz and lots of helpful information on the Internet.  The Santa Cruz Sentinel, with their awful (new-and-improved) web site, are covering all bases by providing the Evacuation Checklist.  When I saw this I thought, “this could be handy.”  Think about it: you’re in a panic trying to concentrate on what you should do/what you should take/how much time you’ve got to get out.  Having a list could really focus your attention, right?  Ok.  So, here is the list.  Obviously the person who prepared this wasn’t faced with having to evacuate any time soon.  But, for those who like to be prepared, this is a great list.

Is it right to categorize this under “stupid stuff” and “safety”?

Ok. With a few less clothes. But both sports rely on the ‘ole fingers to signal. Just like a catcher in baseball. What the heck is he talking about. I’m still getting primed up for beach volleyball in Santa Cruz this weekend. I gotta know what’s going on. And, I’m a visual person - picture’s worth a thousand or so words, etc. So, here’s where I see the similarities. In baseball you’ve got a pitcher who has to spend the whole game squinting to look at the catcher’s crotch to figure out what pitch he’s suppose to throw. Who came up with this? Why doesn’t the pitcher just decide. How friggin’ complicated can it be. He’s only got a handful of pitches.

But, it’s beach volleyball I’m more interested in right now. So. Same kinda signal thing. This time, the server looks at her teammate’s butt to get the signal for the serve. They don’t do this is tennis doubles, so why is this really necessary. I think what we’ve got goin’ on here is a little “chatter among the girls.” See what I think this signal means is, “when we wrap up here, I’m looking for a two on one.” Or, “see that guy over there? Let’s double him up.” Whatta’ you think? Come on gals, help me out here - you’ve been outed.

Oh. I forgot to give you the link. Sorry. Hey. Don’t look at this - this is what got the Patriots in trouble. And, a lotta other people too. I gotta take my blood pressure pills.

I think I’m gonna like this beach volleyball thing. See you in Santa Cruz.

I’m shocked at the number of folks who received the Typo newzletter today and opened the beach volleyball shot. Horrible. We should be ashamed of ourselves. But, what’s done is done. So, in response to those who have written and ask if there was more where that came from, I say simply “tisk, tisk.” But, because I am thorough and leave few stones unturned so to speak, I do have a few more shots that didn’t make the first cut.

Sure is different than football. I mean at a football game who wants to sit behind the goal post. In beach volleyball I’m learning that is the spot that an awful lot of people covet. I can’t believe that they allow photographers to sit there. I mean really. This is just…. Well, it’s what’s wrong with America! God bless America.

Some of you with heart conditions or blood pressure variances will only be able to look at one, maybe two of these “rejected” shots. So, here is 1, 2, 3.

I think I warned you not to look at that one.

Memorial weekend. Forget what the holiday is really about - now it’s the opening of Summer. None too soon either. Let the party begin. Santa Cruz is not to be outdone. Party we will this weekend. Boardwalk is open and ready. Steamer Lane will be full of longboarders as the 24th annual Santa Cruz Longboard Club Invitational takes place. What about an air show - Watsonville brings you that. If that isn’t enough, how about a good ole’ fashion beach volleyball tournament. There is an open men’s and an open women’s division. I don’t know about you, but there is just something about a couple of gals in bikinis diving, jumping and spiking the ball that seems like Summer. Thinkin’ about a ride to Santa Cruz this weekend? Don’t leave us out, we’ll be here kickin’ with some cool ones. Join us.

Editorial note: I thought the photo was insanely inappropriate to use. But, my editor (a women) suggested that it was the only image that would convey the despicable nature of this culture of male-dominated, bikers degrading women for amusement. Was she putting us down? I still feel bad about including this picture (and it’s full size version accessible with a simple double-click) just to get you to read my blob posts. Being an equal rights blobber it seems only fitting to include an inappropriate photo for our better halves. Damnest thing is - I can’t find one. Send yours in to me and we’ll post the best. And, please accept our apologies. My editor made me do it. Honest.

I’m sorry but this smacks of “Forensic Science Gone Wild.”  After 40 years, it seems that a “local” Death Valley detective and his cadaver dog Buster think there might be some bodies buried at the ole’ Mansion Family Barker Ranch.  So, a group of 40 or so scientists and authorities decide it’s the right time to investigate this.  Shit, if they find something, we can have a NEW Manson trial.  Was it the lure of the bright lights and CourtTV or was it simply the irresistible opportunity to play with their ground penetrating radar and chemical sniffers that has led to the boondoggle?  You be the judge - watch this.

This just in …they didn’t find anything.  Your tax dollars at work.

I was unfamiliar with LisaNova (prior to reading the article I’ve attached to this post - but I’m getting ahead of myself).  In fact, I didn’t know how much I needed her.  Truth be told my YouTube posts weren’t getting the kind of “play time” that I’d hoped for.  Now I get it.  I was missing the right “teaser” content.  Wow.  Who would have thought if I’d sex-up my videos, more people would watch them.  Armed with that knowledge I was further stymied by not having a “talent” to sex-up my videos.  Here is where LisaNova comes in.  Read this article, watch the video, and your videos will receive much higher view’rship - or your money back….  Thank you LisaNova!

This article from ABC News Science & Technology is creepy.  Might even give you nightmares.  I knew that from the title: Killer Mouse on the Loose.  But I read it anyway.  Warning: DON’T read this article.  Ok.  There.  You’ve been warned.  If you choose to read it, you’ll probably find it fascinating - like I did.

Seems on Gough Island - that’s in the South Atlantic - a predatory “supermouse” has evolved.  Introduced a long, long time ago to the island by seal hunters, this mouse has morphed from a plant eating little thing to a mammoth, seabird killer.  By mammoth, I mean about three times the size of a house mouse.  As I read this story I can’t help thinking of the tiny, winy dog at the park that take off after the German Shepard.  Gonna put it in its place.  This “killer” mouse goes after and devours alabtross chicks that weigh in about 300 times more than the mouse.  There’s more.  But, I don’t want to spoil it for you….

Remember early in the post, I said: DON’T read the article.

What to call this.  Or, really even how to describe it.  Other than to say it is quite entertaining.  And, creative - in a warped sort of way.  Enjoy.  A big thanks to our Texas editorial office for sending us this link.  (That’s right, the Typo is going national!  Somehow we’re stuck in Texas.  Dam this is a big state.  Help!  Which way out?  South, North, East, West - it’s all just hot and flat….)