Mike’s Typo

I’m not much for porn.  It’s not that I don’t think it has a purpose.  It just seems so fake.  But, this.  This is just funny.  It has the right amount of sexuality with a huge overtone of “let’s not take ourselves too seriously.”  This is my Friday night.  All this research for Typo readers.  I am your humble servant.

Oh, and did I mention, I’m a huge Mini fan.  If Harley would only wake up and see the value of marketing.  Knock, knock - anyone home?

Well.  I guess I wasn’t the only one with a soft spot for George Carlin.  I got more emails about the Carlin posts and the Special Edition of the Typo, than anything else I’ve done.  Take that back - ‘cept that body painted model in Thunder Press a few years back.  Got lots of fan mail for Miss Behavin’.  Oh, and one nasty letter from mother-Harley suggesting that body paint did not hide the fact that this wonderful young lady was nude.  I was at the photo session - it didn’t feel like she was nude.  Really, Mom.  But, this is all a different story.  Another time maybe.

I was talking about the fan mail for George.  Many of you sent me your favorite pieces.  When I first started getting the emails, I vowed to include the attachments in this week’s Typo.  So, by rough count that would have made the Typo about 5 or sex screens worth.  So.  I had to pick again.  Here is an audio of a routine Carlin did about bikers.  I’d heard about it, but never heard it.   What a treat.  But, then I got to thinkin’ - bad move, right.  What if this offends a bunch of my customers?  Then I got to thinkin’ further - who the —k cares, this is George Carlin at his finest.  And, as we all know there was a lot of George at his finest.  Advisory: the following audio may be harmful to the egos of some of the biker crowd reading this blob….  Too much thinkin’  I need a nap.

Speaking of  tributes to George. HBO has been airing stuff all week.  But, the one I’m waiting for is from the SNL archives.  This Saturday night, SNL digs deep.  Back to their premiere.  Translated: first show.  That’s right.  Carlin was the first host.  Musical entertainment might feel a bit dated, but Carlin’s three routines will be enjoyed once again.  As will an amazing performance by Andy Kaufman.  Tivo it.  DVR it.  Don’t miss it.

BTW.  If you missed the last Typo.  You missed a couple of good posts on Carlin - including my Top 5.  Find them on the blob.

You need prozak or ridelin just to get through the mind-bogglingly frustrating experience.  But, of course you can’t get the drugs (or your toothpaste) through security.

You’d think this new idea comes from Santa Cruz.  But, the dateline of this article is actually Denver.  Not saying this is a good idea.  But, it’s novel.

No not Clinton - and that was nearly eight years ago, if my math is correct.  We’re talking Bill Gates.  Gates, at 52, retires from Microsoft and will move on to run his philanthropic foundations.  No small feat in and of itself.  The foundation is richer than most countries.  NPR has written a nice article about Gates and this milestone in Microsoft history.  But, the gem in the rough is a video embedded in the article.  Apparently done for this year’s Consumer Electronic Show and Bill’s keynote speech, the video is worth a watch.  It’s funny.  How’d they get all these people to cameo?  Well, I guess when you’re the richest guy on the planet, you can get anything done.  What will Bill do next?  Lov’em or hate him, Bill Gates now has the opportunity to change our world - once again.

Could be the radiation from your cell phone.  Seems not all cell phones are created equal when it comes to radiation.  Not saying whether it’s bad or good.  I don’t know.  Just reporting the facts here.  The NY Times ran a piece a few weeks back.  Gives you links to find your phone and it’s emitted radiation.  Or is that admitted radiation.  What’s that bump on the side of your head?  Next they’ll be telling us that chocolate chip cookies are bad for us!

I used to read the Fake Steve Jobs blog religiously and daily.  But, when I found out who the fake was, it took the wind out of the sails.  So, now I’m an occasional visitor.  Today was the day for a quick visit.  Just to see what FSJ had to say about Carlin.  Nice little poem.  Nothing worthy of reprinting.  But this is. I guess FSJ is now faking Jerry Yang (Yahoo).  This letter of resignation complete with pull down selections is priceless.  Should make you laugh.  Might even be portable to your workplace.  Umm, not at SCHD though.  Enjoy.

I wished I’d seen him in concert just one more time.  George Carlin could make an audience laugh.  He could make an audience think.  And, while you were thinking, you were having fun.  So, we can all poo poo Google for buying YouTube.  But, God luv ‘em.  They’ve made showing you my top 5 possible.  Here are my five favorite Carlin routines - tonight.  Tomorrow, I might have five more.  Five different.  But, tonight, here are five that will make you laugh.  And, five that will make you think.  There in no particular order.  Except for the last one.  Play it last.  And, then think about how much fun it would be to put George Carlin and Al Gore on the same playbill.

1. Airplane Announcements 1 & 2

2. Baseball and Football

3. Ten Commandments (gonna lose some folks here; stay with me)

4. White People

5. Saving the Planet

By George, ….

Not Bush.  At least not yet.

It’s old news now.  But, we said goodbye to a great wordsmith today.  George Carlin.  Dead at the age of 71.  Lots of articles covering the who, what, when, and where.  So, Google those on your own.  There are some classic Carlin routines.  One that we posted on this blob a while back.  But, it seems his most famous, surrounded in controversy at the time, is still relevant today.  “Seven Words” was a routine that Carlin introduced to the world in the early seventies.  In Wisconsin.  Shocking the audience during the performance got him thrown in jail.  Ultimately it unleashed a debate about what is appropriate to say over the air waves.  Here is a CNN piece that I think is interesting.  And, for those of you who prefer to read the routine, thanks to the Village Voice for this.  God bless YouTube.  For without it, giving you this wonderful George Carlin would be impossible.

George, you will be missed.

I don’t report enough “feel good” stories.  Or, so it seems whenever I come across one that I want to blob about.  Here’s one.  Hilary Lister, 36, and a sailor from England is attempting a solo sail around the British Isles.  I’ve seen that water and it’s rough, nasty stuff (like British food).  But, this doesn’t seem like a news worthy feat until you add that she is a quadriplegic.  She hasn’t always been.  She suffers from a painful, progressive neurological disease that is slowly killing her.  At 15, she lost the use of her legs.  Since then, virtually everything else.  The story is fascinating, humbling and inspiring.  It’s a short read.  It’s a true “feel good” story.  A nice change from all that beach volleyball.

On Adriana Lima.  “Who?” you ask.  Let me take you back to the earlier days of the Typo (before I started blobbing).  It was this video where we introduced Adriana Lima.  Then came her super, pre-Super Bowl commercial.  Got your attention now?  Ok.  So, I’m walking around the store in a daze trying to get Tron Man out of my head (see earlier post).  I’m relating all of this to one of our “regulars.”  He suggests a video that he thinks might block Tron Man from my conscience and sub-con.  So, I’m game.  Next thing I know, there are 20 people in the sales office watching this video.  Really 20.  It looked like one of those Volks Bugs stuffed with people.

I can say the video worked.  I’m Tron-free - for now.  And, I’m pleased to say, that I knighted this wonderful regular as Reader 007 in appreciation of his selfless contribution.

Enough jiberish.  You’re looking for more ALima.  I know.  But, I’m warning you, it’s like that last chocolate chip cookie.  One too many is one toooo many.  Here you go.  More Adriana.   I’m not sure if it was that video or this wonderful late, late, late night exchange that put me over the edge.  But, I’ve definitely OD’d.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you.